


Black Water

by Marcythewolf



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Blood, Chaptered, Demon AU, Does this au have a proper name??, Everythings pretty tame so far, F/F, Murder, Mutual Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, References to past suicides, Song fic, Will add tags as the plot progresses
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-02-11 01:47:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,030
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12924720
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Marcythewolf/pseuds/Marcythewolf
Summary: Imagine a world where demons are sent from the pits of hell to torment you into ending your life. Well unfortunately, that was reality for Lapis Lazuli, a tired Uni student with a shitty underpaying job and nothing but a few pennies in her wallet. Her life sucked and honestly, kicking the bucket didn't seem that bad if it wasn't for the promise of a brighter future in her dream job. Enter Peridot; a small demon who had been in her situation decades prior until the fatal day of her demise. Now she lingers around hell, killing off any stubborn mortal who got in her way.That is, until she met Lapis.[WARNING]This fic contains somewhat graphic depictions of violence and gore, self harm, suicide, murder, past abuse, and foul language.My Tumblr





	1. Smoke and Mirrors

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sort-of song fic. Basically the chapter titles are gonna be songs that fit with the plot of the fic. 
> 
> First song is Smoke and Mirrors by Imagine Dragons!!

A loud, jagged sob cut through the silence. A figure crouching low on the floor, head in his hands, shoulders shaking as he cried out. Tears fell from his once bright blue eyes, now dull and glazed over from hatred. Hatred for who exactly? Well, that was easy. 

Hatred for the demon looming over him, arms crossed stubbornly over her chest, green eyes glowing in the dark room, piercing his back. He knew she was staring at him, he knew she held no sympathy. This was just another name to cross off her list. He wondered if he'd end up like her. A corrupted soul, sent out to ruin mortals lives. Drive them to suicide. To corrupt him like the dark forces did to them. He shook under her hard gaze, too stubborn to give into her wishes but too tired to fight back. 

It had been over a year now. He remembered the first day she'd come knocking on his door, an innocent looking girl, around 20-ish, short, the brightest green eyes he had ever seen. She introduced herself as Peridot, shook his hand and let herself in. A friendship had blossomed that day, and he thought bitterly about what would've happened if it hadn't. But then he realised that that was unlikely, it was her job after all. He wasn't sure how long she'd been doing it, just that it was his turn to die and he wasn't going to let that happen. His stubbornness had made it worse. More painful. It had made her angry.

Peridot stood over him, wearing a flannel shirt and jeans. She almost looked normal, sans for the crazed look in his eyes, the blown out pupils staring into his soul. She was watching. Waiting. He wouldn't give her the satisfaction of giving in. She knew that. He wondered if she'd just leave if he didn't do it. He wondered what would happen if he didn't. 

He finally sat up, shaking as he rose to his feet, rubbing at his sore eyes with the sleeves of his shirt. 

It took him a while to notice the blood and even longer to process where it was coming from. And then he slowly lowered his arm. It bumped onto his hip, and he felt a sharp stinging sensation. He looked down, and then back up to the demon, smaller than him, but still equally as vicious. She was grinning. Her eyes flashed and followed him eagerly as he fell to the floor. Blood surrounded him, his vision blurring and his heartbeat pounding in his ears, frantically trying to keep the blood pumping into his veins. But it was spilling just as fast. Spilling from the open wounds on his arms. Slashed across his stomach. 

His vision grew cloudy as his cheek hit the wooden floor of his room. Black fuzz began to appear in the corners of his vision and once he knew what was going to happen, he panicked. His heart beat even faster, blood poured out of his body even faster and soon he was gasping for air. Green eyes bore into him, watching. She was straight faced, unsympathetic to his desperate cries. 

The last thing he saw was a toothy grin and something long and sharp slash across his neck. He finally bled out on his bedroom floor, cold and unmoving. 

The demon sighed, almost in relief. That had taken way too long. Trust Yellow to give her the hard jobs. She tucked the knife away, ignoring the stains on her hands, and the way her shirt grew darker as blood seeped through the thin fabric. 

Without a second glance at him, she felt around the room, desperate for an escape now that the smell of blood was starting to fill the room. She wondered how long it'd be before he was found. How long it'd be before a murder case was opened. Not long she thought as she finally pinched the air, and moved her arm in a downwards motion. The air was ripped open, and it only took her mere seconds to step through the void and close it back up again, leaving the lifeless body to be found by neighbours in the morning. 

Now she was in a room. It was large and dark with grey painted walls and a stone floor. Several doors were scattered around the perimeter, leading to different parts of the building. At the top of the room was another, larger door. A yellow diamond had been painted onto the fancy wood, chipped from the all the years it hadn't been given another coating. 

The long metal handle twisted and Peridot stood to watch as it opened. For a second, the room behind it was revealed. An office blanketed in a warm yellow light. If she squinted she could see the silhouette of a leg being bounced impatiently from behind the large oaken desk but before she could conclude, the door snapped shut. The figure, a demon, spun on her heel and was about to step over to the left to exit through one of the side doors when she finally met eyes with Peridot. Her neutral expression widened into a grin as she bounded over. Peridots lips twitched up into the ghost of a smile as her old friend caught up to her, immediately wrapping her arm around the smaller's head and pulling her into a headlock, ruffling the blonde curls on her head and barking out a laugh at the squeak that came from Peridots mouth. 

"Per!" She greeted happily in her usual gravely voice. 

"Jasper" the blonde replied less enthusiastically than her taller friend. 

Jasper didn't seem to notice, only continued grinning as she let go and watched as Peridot's hands shot up to fix her hair. 

To put it simply, Jasper wasn't the type of demon you'd want to get stuck with. She was tall and muscular with dark skin and amber eyes. Her fangs stuck out from behind her lips when she smirked, and she had a unnerving aura to her. Thick stripes of lighter skin were wrapped around her upper bicep, hands, legs and face, making her look like a tiger, and her bleached white mane of hair and long horns that stretched up towards the ceiling just added to the fear factor. She wore the required uniform for demons in this sector: a suit with a yellow diamond imprinted onto the breast pocket. It was stained a reddish orange colour, which Peridot could only guess was either food or blood from her latest victim. 

"Soooo" Jasper drawled, breaking the comfortable silence between the two. She lifted up a finger to pick at something in between her teeth with her clawed hands and flicked it onto the ground when she'd found it. 

Peridot grimaced, about to tell off her friend for the disgusting act she had just witnessed when Jasper continued speaking, not noticing the way Peridot reeled in anger at being ignored. 

"How'd it go? I know you said before that your mortal was putting up a fight. Did you have to finish the job?" She asked, raising a thick eyebrow, eyes darting to the dry blood that still caked her hands. 

Peridot hummed her reply, nodding once and bitterly rubbing her hands over her shirt in an attempt to get rid of the blood. Her mouth was set into a straight line as she discarded the knife and stuffed her hands into her pockets. 

Jasper just grinned "Ha! Never though you'd have it in ya, Per" she laughed and slapped her palm across her back a little too hard. Peridot stumbled forward, trying to regain her balance before her head connected with the floor. Jasper grabbed the collar of her shirt before she tipped over. 

"Whatever" Peridot grumbled, prying herself out of Jaspers grip and taking a cautious step away from the larger. "I had to do what I had to do, that fucker wasn't going to die anytime soon, I just sped up the process" her lips twisted into a grim smirk as she remembered the look of horror painted on his face as he collapsed. 

Jasper seemed to notice and her grin suddenly became impossibly wider as she cooed "aww. My little Peri is finally growing up! Remember when you first got here?" 

"No, not really" Peridot deadpanned. 

"Well, you were so scared and small, it looked like you didn't belong. I remember your first mission, how reluctant your were. I had to try and calm you down before you had a breakdown right in this very room". 

Peridot nodded along, her cheeks warm from embarrassment. How could Jasper even remember this? Hadn't she been here longer? 

"And after you came back, you wouldn't speak to anyone for months" she threw back her head and laughed. 

"That's because I used to be one of them. I used to be human. And I'd never had to kill another human before" Peridot growled, trying to justify herself. 

Jasper lifted up one shoulder as some sort of shrug "well. You seem fine with it now" she replied. 

Peridot rolled her eyes "yeah, I'm used to it by now. Its been..how long? Decades?" She didn't feel human anymore, that feeling had been torn away the first day she had arrived in this shitty place. The first time she'd watched her mortal die. She had been the cause of her death. She had felt guilty for ages. But now all she felt was numbness. 

The taller demon opened her mouth to speak when she was suddenly interrupted by a shrill voice yelling the blondes name. The latter spun round, eyes sweeping around the room until they came to the door Jasper had exited minuted ago. A tall thin woman stood outside it, straight back and arms folded neatly behind her. She stared down her long nose at Peridot, and repeated her name once more. 

"Peridot, Yellow Diamond would like to see you" she said, the ghost of a smug grin pulling at her lips. 

Peridot bobbed her head in a nod, taking a glance at Jasper, who gave her a determined grin, and then back to the woman tapping her foot impatiently on the floor. 

"Hurry now, we don't have all day!" She growled "Its rude to keep your diamond waiting". 

The blonde fought the urge to roll her eyes as she strode over to, and finally, inside the room. The door was closed delicately behind the pair with a faint click. It had locked. There was no escaping now. 

Behind the desk Peridot had seen previously was a high ranking demon, sitting forward with her hands propping up her face, her yellow eyes slits, staring at Peridot. It made her tremble, how ferocious she looked with her sharp features and those piercing eyes. She wore a suit, yellow and formal, a necklace with a yellow diamond hung on her chest, her hair was somewhat messy but made her appearance look more intimidating, with how it stood up in places Peridot wasn't even sure hair could do. 

"Peridot" she said. Her voice was deep, soothing. A shiver ran down Peridot's spine as she took the seat in front of her superior. 

"My diamond" she bowed her head. 

"I'm glad to see you got back from your mission safely" Yellow commented, eyes trailing down her body as she spoke. "We wouldn't want a repeat of last time, would we?" 

Peridot shook her head, not saying anything in case she accidentally said something stupid. Or started rambling, she did that when she was nervous. That was the kind of stuff that would get you killed in this business. Her diamond was the most ruthless of them all. 

Yellow seemed to take her silence as an answer and continued on "good, good" she leant back in her seat, arms crossed over her chest, head still tilted down, eyes still on the tiny demon before her. "Well, I'd like to formally tell you who your next victim is. She's been a bit of trouble to gather information from but don't worry, I'm sure you can squeeze out some more. 

"Her name is Lapis Lazuli. Female. She's twenty-one, studying Marine Biology at the local University in Beach City. Dirt poor, spent all her money on classes, barely had enough to function properly. She has a job working at a cafe near campus but it's low paying and she isn't very happy in it. Has PTSD from a childhood trauma, very hard to get close to but I'm sure you can manage my dear Peridot". 

Peridot let that all sink in. Okay, didn't seem that bad. Maybe it'd be easier than the last guy. She hoped it would be, blood stains are hard to wash off clothes, especially the soft cotton of her shirt. 

Then, she nodded once "of course my Diamond". 

Yellow smiled her sly smile, then motioned for the women to dismiss her. Peridot walked through the large door and flinched as it clicked behind her. She was immediately met by Jasper, who had been trying to listen in on the conversation by pressing her ear to the door. The yellow woman threw her a dirty look before it shut.

"So" she began, placing a large palm on Peridot's shoulder. 

"Just another mission" she replied, bored, but for some reason she couldn't stop the way her heart pounded loudly in her chest. This was the first time in years that she'd gotten a subject her age. She couldn't stop the pang of excitement in her chest as she followed Jasper through one of the side doors and into another, separate room filled with other lingering demons.

"I'll leave for Earth tomorrow. I think its time we finally caught up over a drink" she smirked and Jasper threw back her head and laughed as the door closed behind them.

•

"Hello, welcome to Fusion Cuisine! How can I help you today?" A fake smile.

The man smiled warmly down at her, one hand on the shoulder of his young daughter, who was looking around the establishment in child-like wonder, the other propped up on the counter as he leant forward to read the menu.

"Can I have a bacon sandwich aaand" he glanced down at the kid, then his eyes flicked back up to the barista on the other side of the counter "a ham one, two chocolate chip cupcakes" the small form next to him let out a whoop of delight as he spoke. He chuckled under his breath "and two servings of hot chocolate". 

A nod. And then a cheap biro pen pressing down onto the flimsy notepad paper. The faint tapping of buttons on the cash register as she took the money owed and set it into the machine. A receipt slowly edged out, she tore it off and handed it back to the man. 

"Here you go! Order 1134, I'll call you up when its ready".

"Thank you". 

She turned towards the back of the room where the kitchen was situated. A small pudgy girl was standing by the door, leaning on the far counter, lavender hair tied up into a messy bun. A black apron was tied around her front, as all employees wore, as well as the standard dark uniform. She glanced up from her phone and took the order, slinking back into the kitchen to grab the fresh food. 

Turning back around, she noticed there was no line. The cafe itself was fairly empty, the father and daughter were sitting at a table closest to the counter, the former taking quick glances towards her to check if the order was ready. Other than that, there were a couple of students hanging around, most likely grabbing food between classes and frantically trying to finish assignments. A guy she recognized from her biology lecture was sitting by the window with his laptop and a coffee, another group of around four or five were by the left wall, chatting casually about classes and homework they had to catch up on. She vaguely heard something about a dorm party but decided listening in wasn't worth her time.

"Lapis" 

She jumped a little at the sudden noise that had so abruptly cut off her thoughts. 

"Amethyst". 

The girl shot her a concerned look and handed her the tray with the current order on it. She brought it back to the counter, raising her voice as she said "order 1134".

The man gratefully rose from his seat, leaving the bouncing child in order to grab the food and sit back down. 

With a sigh, Lapis checked the time on the clock on the far wall. Only another twenty minutes until her shift ended and she could go and rest. She knew she had a class at 6am so she'd have to get up fairly early. Lapis' sleeping schedule was already fucked up as it was, so waking up at 5:30 to get ready would be hell. But it was worth it she thought to herself, leaning her arms against the counter as she daydreamed. 

The world was beginning to go a little fuzzy as her mind drifted off into other places. It often did that, usually when she was stressed or sad or bored in class. It was frustrating but it was a way to rest her brain from the mountains of information she had to remember. 

A cold hand landed on her shoulder and she tensed up. She didn't have time to turn her head enough to see who it was before they spoke. 

"Lapis, are you doing okay? You've been zoning out a lot lately" Pearls voice was uncharacteristically soft as she spoke to Lapis. 

"I'm fine. Just tired" her default excuse. 

Pearl gave her a disbelieving look but didn't press on, instead nodding once and leaving Lapis to go back to the kitchen. 

As soon as the clock hit 6:00pm, Lapis tore off her apron, threw it back onto its hook and jumped over the counter, ignoring the shrill cries of Pearl yelling about "how unhygienic that was!"

Lapis didn't care, she was out the door before Pearl could stop her, and was striding down the street back to her apartment, a block away from campus. 

Her apartment was on the third floor. It was small, only a couple rooms: kitchen, two small bedrooms, living room and bathroom.. Each of the rooms varied in size but were only big enough for Lapis and all her stuff. As she climbed the stairs, she rummaged around in her pocket for her keys and shoved them into the lock, twisting back and forth until she heard the familiar click. The door was stiff and usually needed force to open. She used her shoulder to push against it as she turned the handle in unison. The door flew open and she stumbled forward, swearing as she almost lost her balance. Shutting the door was a lot easier. It jammed itself back into the frame as she slammed it shut, locking it before collapsing on the ratty blue sofa in the middle of the living room and sinking into the grimy fabric with a sigh. 

She didn't move for a while, just sitting, staring as her limbs throbbed and eventually grew numb from the lack of movement. She sat like this until her neck started hurting from the weird angle she was in, and until the buzzing in her legs became too unbearable. Then she stood up. Black fuzz danced around the corners of her vision, eventually growing in size as she tried to rapidly blink it away. Her head throbbed and she stumbled towards the kitchen, ignoring the pricking in her legs as blood rushed back into them. Again, this happened a lot. It made her feel ill but it also made her feel human. Like she existed in this world, no matter how she felt. How distant she was from others. How distant she felt from the world. 

Empty drawers were a common thing in her kitchen. She didn't have much money, only enough to get the necessities, like food and bath products and pens and notebooks for class. And even at that, she could still barely afford them. 

A small silhouette of a packet in the corner of the top drawer caught her eyes. She eagerly reached in and grabbed it. It was a packet of instant ramen noodles, a little crushed but still edible. With a grin she stood up and began preparing the meal. 

It wasn't the best. But in all honesty, she wasn't the best at cooking. It would do for tonight though, at least until she could go out and buy more food. Sitting comfortably on her sofa, one leg slipped underneath her body, took out her phone and opened up the Netflix app to catch up on some recent shows. Setting it on the coffee table (no, she did not have a TV), she tapped on 'Black Mirror' and settled down to eat. 

By the time she had finished watching season 1, it was almost 2am. Lapis cursed loudly when she checked the time, standing up to throw her empty bowl into the sink, set an alarm on her phone before diving into bed, still in her uniform, and squeezing her eyes shut, willing herself to sleep. She'd have to wake up in about 3 hours but any sleep was worth not having to go to class half awake. Or not falling asleep at your desk. 

As her mind grew dark, her thoughts drifted elsewhere until finally, she lost consciousness and let sleep pull her away. 

• 

With a final slap on the back from her old friend, Peridot turned away, newfound excitement in her next mission, and opened up a portal. After a night of drinking and catching up with her only friend, Peridot was ready to get on with her job. Even if it meant having to do so with a slight throbbing headache. She'd live. Or...not. 

Stepping through, she was met with a dark alleyway, the go-to place for demon transportation. It was quick and easy to take in the surroundings of nearby streets, and also a good way to hide from any passing mortals. Quickly, Peridot shifted back into her human form and wandered out into the street where she almost collided with a passing mortal. Cursing, she turned a corner and made her way to her set destination. 

It turned out to be a fresh, shiny looking building with pastel pink walls, accented with an oaken interior. On top of the building, on a large sign in neat cursive read 'Fusion Cuisine'. With a sigh, she pushed open the door. A tiny bell rang as she entered, alerting the young woman with strawberry blonde hair standing at the counter, who smiled a wide smile and greeted her with a cheery "welcome to Fusion Cuisine! How can I help you today?" 

Peridot grimaced and looked up at the menu boards as she strolled over. Finally looking back down once she'd picked "A black coffee, please".

The girl behind the counter gave her an inquisitive look "is that all?"

A nod. And then another strange glance as she received the money owed (money Peridot had collected from past missions) and went off to make the drink. Only once it was slid across he counter and into her waiting palms did she move from her spot. And then, it was only to take a lone seat next to the window and take tiny sips as she watched the people passing by. 

That was, until she spotted her. The dark skinned woman with electric blue hair hurrying across the street, frantically doing up the buttons of her shirt as she walked. She hiked a bag over her shoulder, jumping back as a car screeched to a halt in front of her. The long drone of a car horn mixed with the angry yells of the driver, and the quiet apologies of the woman. And then she entered the shop, out of breath and a little shaken up. 

That's her Peridot thought, watching as she talked to the other woman and eventually slid behind the counter, tying an apron over her front. The blonde sipped her drink, trying not to stare, but also trying to act as casual as she could, not wanting to scare off the mortal like she had done so many other times. Her little act worked differently for each mortal she was given. It depended on a lot of things, but the one thing that worked 9 out of 10 times, was just talking to them. Introducing herself. And then dropping the bomb. Tormenting them, filling their minds with toxic thoughts. So she waited until her cup was empty before standing back up for a refill. 

The blue haired girl girl nodded as she took the order, accepting the money and making the drink before falling into a casual conversation. 

"Are you new here? Haven't seen you around" she asked as she handed Peridot the drink. 

The demon hummed in reply "Just got here actually, and planning to stay for a while" was all she said.

"Well, have fun I guess. Spoiler alert: this place is very underwhelming despite what it says on the tourist websites". 

A chuckle. Lapis' lips twitched upwards. This is going well.

As Peridot took her seat again and began to drink, she noticed Lapis taking quick glances in her direction, as if she knew something was up. Her eyes were narrowed into thin slits, like Peridot's story didn't add up, but she didn't want to call her out in case she was wrong. 

As the sky grew darker, Lapis finally stepped away from the counter, throwing her apron haphazardly onto a hook and grabbing her stuff. She glanced at Peridot, a crooked little smile on her lips as she left, muttering a tiny "goodbye" that the demon had to strain to hear. Peridot sat in her seat for a couple of seconds, her hands gripping tightly around the empty mug. It had been empty for hours, she suddenly realised. She also only had so much money. As she stood up, sliding the mug over to the lavender haired girl who winked at her as she took it and carried it though a set of double doors, Peridot could feel the caffeine running through her body. How many cups had she had? Who knows but however many it was, it seemed she'd never run out of this newfound energy. 

The blonde exited the building and glanced around, spying Lapis' leaving form ducking being a building at the far end of the street. Her legs moved on their own accord, following her silently as the blue hared woman crossed the road and entered into an apartment block. The door shut behind her and a tiny buzz indicated that it had been automatically locked behind her. 

With a sigh, she figured trying to get Lapis' attention was useless. Peridot was better off just wandering around aimlessly until the sun rose. And then what? Wait for Lapis to come out of the building? No, that would make her look like she had followed her home....which she had. But no one needed to know that. So instead, she turned around and walked forward. Once again, her legs seemed to drive her forward, destination unknown. She strolled casually back across the road, and down a street lit only in the yellow hue of the street lamps. The paths were stained a dusty yellow colour and she watched as the colour bled onto her shoes as he walked under the lights. 

Her legs stopped by a house. It was small and rundown, with an old rusty gate hanging half off its hinges and an overgrown garden. The door looked like it hadn't seen a paint job in years and the windows were cracked beyond recognition. And yet, a familiar warmth filled Peridot at the sight of this shitty rundown building. Memories pushed against the surface of her mind, trying to resurface, but as much as she willed them on, her mind grew fuzzy and dull. This happened a lot, especially when she tried to recall her past life. Sometimes her consciousness would try and give her clues; a flash of a face in a dream, a smell wafting into her nose, and now her legs carrying her to this house. But it was just that. A house. Kind of average looking save from how it looked like it hadn't been touched in centuries. 

Sitting down on the sidewalk, facing the house, hunched forward, knees pulled over to her chest, eyes never leaving the house, wracking her brain for memories she didn't even know if she had. Blinking back the sudden tears that overwhelmed her, angrily wiping them away with her sleeve. She vaguely remembers standing up and walking back down the street. 

• 

Lapis wakes up on her own accord the next morning. It was the weekend and she finally got to sleep in after an exhausting week of schoolwork and her shitty job. Sitting up, she rubbed her eyes, ran a hand through her bed head and decided to take a quick shower before grabbing a bowl of cornflakes and lowering herself carefully onto her bed, carefully not to spill the goods. She had plans to stay in all weekend, maybe catch up on some old netflix shows she'd missed, or do some studying. The former was more likely. Socializing was the last thing Lapis wanted to do on her two day break. It always made her feel uncomfortable and fidgety whenever she'd go out in public with her friends. It was like something was constricting her lungs, forcing her to take in sharp breaths as she maneuvered through large crowds of people, the feeling growing as she brushed arms with a tourist, who didn't even acknowledge her as they slipped past. The way no one seemed to care if they accidentally bushed against a stranger in the large crowds. The way it made Lapis feel disgusting and uncomfortable. The close contact. The-

Shaking her head, the blue haired woman tried not to dwell on those thoughts for too long. She knew it wasn't normal to feel like that. She knew it wasn't normal to feel more comfortable in isolation. But it felt right in her mind. Her cloudy, twisted mind. 

She had prepared herself to spend the weekend binging. So, of course, she wasn't at all prepared when she realised someone had been trying buzz into the building until the dull sound managed to snake its way into her brain. Standing up, she threw on a hoodie and jogged downstairs to open the door. 

The short blonde girl she'd briefly spoken to at the café was on the other side, looking moderately pissed off. Her finger was raised above the button, poised to press it again. But it dropped when she met Lapis' gaze, her expression turning neutral as she stepped into the building without an invitation. Lapis reeled back a little confused as to what was actually going on. 

"What the fuck-" 

The blonde raised a hand to silence her. A small smile was painted on her freckled face, but it didn't reach her eyes.

"I need to speak with you" she said in her nasally voice that somehow irritated Lapis more than her unexpected and frankly, rude arrival into her home.

"Okay?"

"Preferably alone" her green eyes flicked towards a hallway to the left, a man was standing by one of the doors, a basket full of fresh laundry balanced in one arm as he dug around in his pocket for his keys with the other. 

"Um. Why?"

"Trust me" was the only thing the mysterious girl said before walking over to the stairs. She stood beside them, looking expectantly at her with wide green eyes. 

With a grunt, Lapis forced her legs to begin moving towards her, and then back up the several flights of stairs that led to her apartment. By now she was used to having to walk up all those stairs, but by the way the other had begun wheezing when she turned the corner and started up the second flight, Lapis figured, with a smug smile, that she couldn't say the same for the blonde. 

Halfway up the second flight, the smaller hissed in pain and stopped moving, slouched against the cold steel railing and clutching her leg so hard that her knuckles were beginning to turn pale. 

"Hey, are you okay?" Lapis asked. Yes, of course she was frustrated that a stranger she had met yesterday had figured out where she lived and rudely entered her home, but that didn't stop the way her heart squeezed against her ribs in concern when said trespasser seemed to be hurt. She quickly ran down to where she was, placing a hand on either shoulder and guided her to sit on the step. 

The girl nodded and began massaging the spot on her leg just below the knee. Her shoulders relaxed a little and she opened one eye to gaze at Lapis' concerned frown. A tiny smile tugged at her lips and Lapis almost went back to despising her once again. 

"Do you need at help? What's wrong with your leg?" 

The questions made the blonde wince and reel back. "No I'm fine" she grunted, grabbing the rail with one tiny fist and lifting herself back onto her feet. She began to shuffle up the final couple of stairs, then leant hard on the door, breathless. 

Once inside the apartment, she made a beeline to the sofa, grimacing at the sight of it, but eventually giving in and sinking into the greasy fabric. She began to rub her leg again, in large, slow circles around her kneecap. Lapis sat on the coffee table, legs propped up on the sturdy wood, eyes never leaving the other. 

"So" she began, trailing off as the blonde glanced up. 

"So" she replied, looking away to gaze around the apartment in disgust. "Do you really live like this? The whole place is filthy". 

"Well, you try living in a tiny apartment, barely being able to pay rent every month, whilst also balancing school, work and a lot of other shit going on in your life" she growled. 

"Other shit? Like your PTSD?" Stated the other with a raised eyebrow and a knowing smirk.

"Wha- how did you know-" the blue haired girl shot up from her seat, fists clenched, fingernails digging into the soft, warm skin of her palm. "Who are you?"

"I think the question you should be asking is what am I?"

"What?" 

"Peridot".

Lapis shot her an incredulous look. The blonde was as calm as ever, her expression neutral, one hand draped lazily over the arm of the sofa and the other still on her knee. She never broke eye contact as she spoke in monotone "that's my name. Peridot". 

"Oh" Lapis was a little taken aback by how formal she was now being. But the feeling passed quickly and once again, her blood started to boil. 

"Okay Peridot" she spat the name "who do you think you are coming into my home, and questioning me about private matters that are none of your business" by the time she had finished, her voice had risen in volume. She stood in from of Peridot, so close she could feel her even breaths on her skin. The golden specks in her eyes. The dark freckles littering her cheeks. 

She backed away, not sure why her thoughts had gone that way. But by now the damage had already been done. Peridot stood up from her seat, looked her straight in the eye and left silently. The only sound of her ever being in the building was the thud of her heavy footfalls as she descended the stairs and then tiny grunts of pain that echoed down the stairway. 

Lapis hadn't realised she'd been crying until she felt a tap on her shoulder. She was brought back from her thoughts that clouded her mind. Blinking, she felt another tear roll sadly down her cheek. Sadie, her neighbor, who worked at the local bakery store by the beach, was standing beside her, a friendly arm around her shoulder, guiding her back into the apartment and down into a comfy seat. The click of a kettle boiling that Lapis barely registered as she sat and stared at the doorway. A distant thud as a mug of chai tea was set before her on the coffee table, and the dip of the sofa as a somewhat trusted friend sat by her. Her presence was not unwelcome though she didn't speak. It grounded Lapis. Made her remember of what was important. 

Shaky hands wrapped around the mug and she took a tiny sip, letting the flavours dance around her tongue before swallowing. She repeated several times, not once looking away from the door. A tissue was eventually replaced her mug and she steadily wiped away the tears and snot from her face. 

When Sadie left, the darkness began the swallow her up again. But instead of letting it, she stood up, locked the door and placed the mug into the sink. She made herself something to eat and drank some water before heading to the bathroom to freshen up. 

The weird feeling of dread never left her gut. Something wasn't right. It was like reality had shifted somehow and she knew whatever happened next was going to affect her life. Toy with her emotions, tear them apart and tape them haphazardly back together.

And whatever was going to happen included the stranger who had come to her door. Who had greeted her with a friendly smile back at the cafe. Who had appeared one day and wasn't leaving anytime soon. 

Peridot.


	2. Eet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song is Eet by Regina Spektor, enjoy!

Peridot growled low in her throat as she roughly sat herself on the curb outside the apartment building. Okay she thought, resting her palms on the jagged upturned concrete of the path and leaning her weight onto them. That could've gone better. The pressure of the sharp rock pressing against her fragile human skin cleared her mind a little. Memories of an event that happened mere minutes ago still flashing across her mind. She'd been overly emotional. Lashed out because she was frustrated by her own thoughts. Lapis hadn't deserved that, at least, not at this point in the game.

Lapis had gotten angry. She'd said the wrong thing and the taller women had reacted badly. Of course, this had happened before, some of the mortals she had to deal with were alcoholics, their minds broken before she'd even gotten to them. Too far gone to quit, the threat of their bodies failing if they stopped, and the lingering threat of death if they didn't. Either way, it was a one way trip to the grave and all Peridot had to do was ease them along. 

But this wasn't like those times. Lapis was a student, well enough to attend not only school, but a job, and sane enough to tell something was off about Peridot. The blonde knew gaining her trust would be difficult. Trying to speak to her at work was not a good idea. The blue haired woman woman would most likely ignore her at best, downright refuse to acknowledge her presence at worse. And trying to get back into the building she'd just been kicked out of (even if she left on her own accord) would just make Lapis even more angry. No, she'd have to do it a different way. 

Sighing, she stood up, heading out towards the beach in hopes for a better environment to think things through. The feeling of her weight sinking into the sand was a comfort as she waded her way to a quiet spot at the far end of the beach, well away from the sunbathing tourists and screeching children playing happily in the ocean. Adjusting her glasses so they didn't reflect the sun into her eyes, she lowered herself onto the soft sand and leant back against the cliff behind her, letting out a long, winded breath as she finally relaxed. 

Peridot knew if she didn't gain Lapis' trust her mission would fail, resulting in, most likely, her death. Or whatever happens to defect demons not suitable for Yellow Diamonds sector anymore. It was probably death. An eternity spent in a place even worse than hell, trapped in a cramped, dark room with no air or food or water. Just slowly suffocating for the rest of your life, unable to move. 

Okay wow I should not be thinking about that right now. 

Instead, she turned her gaze away from the sand, over to where it met the shore. She noticed a child, a boy with thick curly hair wearing pink shorts and a tank top with a star on it running between the waves as they lapped up the sand and licked at his bare feet. A girl was with him, dark skinned with long hair tied back into a bun, grinning as she followed the boy, laughing as he fell into the salty water and helping him back up only to fall in with him when he slipped on the slick stones. They both broke out into a loud, contagious laughter, and the demon couldn't help by smile a small smile as they both stood up and continued to run around. She wondered if she had been such a careless child. The only thing she knew for sure was that when she thought about her parents, a sick feeling began to grow in her throat. It made her breath hitch and her heart ache in her chest and she knew whatever relationship she had had with them probably wasn't healthy. Well, her whole mortal life wasn't healthy, she was sure of that. 

But it was useless trying to dwell on the past when she had to deal with the stubborn, angry university student who would probably never talk to her again unless some miracle happened. Or she apologized, but the demon would rather go through yellow diamonds wrath than say sorry to some dumb mortal who she accidentally pissed off. Nonetheless, she needed a way to get closer to Lapis if this whole thing was going to work. And it had better happen soon, moping around, complaining about how hard Lapis was to deal with was wasting precious time she couldn't spare. 

Enrolling into Beach City University seemed like the smart way to go, but lying herself into school seemed like a bit too much hassle and what would she even major in? The same subjects as Lapis? That sounds boring. The blonde had always been interested in engineering and computers, but had never gotten the time to sit down and study them due to her being dead and also having a job to do. Yes, it would be a good opportunity, but she was getting distracted from the task at hand. And that task was currently strolling across the beach, wearing a blue bikini, towel draped over one shoulder, a duffel bag in the other, heading towards the ocean. She stopped to smile and wave at the boy, who grinned the widest grin possible and waved both arms around enthusiastically. The girl beside him gave her a shy wave.

Peridot watched with wide eyes as Lapis dove gracefully into the ocean, dropping her towel onto the sand beforehand. Her head bobbed up to the surface a couple of seconds later. Her blue locks sticking to her wet skin, water dribbling down her bare shoulders as she stood up. Peridot was lucky that she was sitting at the other side of the beach, because she couldn't help the way her eyes darted down her body. It was only because she was so far away, she would later defend, she would've decked her if the demon had been closer. 

Lapis waded through the sea, using her arms to guide her against the rough tides to her destination; the boy. She grinned as he splashed towards her, and quickly splashed him back. A water fight broke out and the sound of laughing filled Peridot's ears, distracting her thoughts. Lapis had a cute laugh she thought, frowning. Okay now that was enough. She had a job to do, and shitting around on this beach was not going to help her any more. She stood up, stretching her sore limbs and started back down the beach in a slow, steady pace. Her eyes never left the sand, refusing to lift her head in case of the lingering fear that she would meet eyes with Lapis. 

Off the beach, onto the pier, winding through the crowds of people milling around Funland, back down onto a small, empty road. Back to the rundown house she had visited the night before. Sitting down on the curb, facing the building, her mind was clear, her memories once again pushing at the surface in her mind. With a groan, she leant forward, cupping her head in her hands. She stayed like that for a long time. 

• 

"Lapis! Wanna come to Funland with me and Connie?" Steven asked, half submerged in the cold ocean. His brown eyes were wide, the ghost of a grin on his chubby face. 

With a silent sigh, Lapis replied with "yeah, sure, Steven" and watched as the boy leapt into the air with a yell of joy and began to swim quickly back to shore. Well, there went all her weekend plans. Grabbing her towel and brushing the sand out of the fabric, she quickly dried herself off, slid on the pair of shorts and tanktop she'd brought with her, and followed the two children away from the beach and towards the arcade. 

As soon as she stepped inside, Lapis was met with blinding lights and a chorus of loud noises coming from noisy kids and the vibrant selection of games. She faltered for a second, waiting for the anxiety rising in her chest to go down a little, trying to get her heart to stop beating so damn loudly. Lapis followed Steven through the arcade, winding through the crowds of people yelling in delight as they beat their friends in a game, and gathering a pile of tickets ready to swap for a prize at the counter. She passed a couple of teens playing Dance Dance Revolution. They had sweat dripping down their faces, eyes concentrated in the arrows, and moving their feet accordingly. One of them messed up and swore loudly as he tripped, the other grinning, looking back at the screen in delight. Player 1 wins!  It exclaimed in bold pink letters. 

They eventually stopped at a small machine that exchanged counters for money. Steven pulled out a note before Lapis could even ask if he needed any money, and slipped it in. Small red counters began to fall from the machine, collecting in a tiny tub for the boy to grab. As soon as he had all of the goods, he spun around and bolted towards the air hockey table. Lapis jogged after him, trying not to lose sight of the kid whilst also trying not to freak out over the overlapping sound of chatter. It was deafening to say the least, the woman could barely hear herself think in all the noise, let alone yell for Steven to Stop Running. 

The air hockey table was vacant when they had arrived. Steven slipped two counters into the slot at the side of the table and gestured for Connie to play against him. Once the two were settled, the game began. Red lights flashed across the table and the quiet whirr of the air meant that it was time to break loose. Steven's arm shot forward, hitting the puck in Connie's direction, who diverted it back to Steven without any trouble. It went back and forth like that for a few moments, both of them to stubborn to lose to the other. Lapis leant against the far wall and watched patiently, trying to focus on the two children instead of everything else. Her head began to throb painfully to the upbeat music.

More flashing lights and a small artificial beeping sound as the puck went into Stevens goal. The boy groaned before congratulating his friend on making the goal and setting the puck back into the middle, starting anew. The next goal was scored by Steven. The second and third by Connie. By the time the game was over, Connie had won by two points, and was grinning over her victory. It was only then that Steven finally acknowledged Lapis. 

"Wanna have a round?" He asked, two more counters already in his hands. 

Lapis blinked a couple of times to stop her eyes from un-focusing again. To bring her mind back into reality. She unfolded her arms and stepped forward. The blue haired woman knew she could never say no to that face, and nodded once before getting into position on the other side of the table. The first round went pretty quickly, Lapis was good at this game, easily scoring against Steven. Eventually, she let the boy score, pretending to accidentally move out the way of the goal and let the puck in. Lapis won by five points. 

After that, Lapis found herself a little more calm. Focusing in on the game had drowned out the overwhelming noises, and her eyes never left Steven as he spun around to have a go at one of the other games. It was the one where you had to throw a ball into a hole, the smaller they were, the harder it was for the ball to get in, and the more points you got. It was multiplayer but Lapis chose to instead sit out, pulling out her phone from her bag and scrolling through her social media and half keeping an eye on the two children. 

By the time the trio were ready to leave the arcade, Steven and Connie had armfuls of tickets, ready to exchange for prizes. They sprinted to the counter as fast as their short legs could carry them. Mr Smiley was waiting for them at the counter, greeting them with a grin and a polite 'Howdy' as they arrived at their destination. Standing on his tiptoes to peek over the tall counter, Steven pushed his pile of tickets towards the man and pointed excitedly towards something Lapis couldn't quite see from the angle she was standing at. Mr Smiley nodded and turned around to take something from the display then handed it to Steven and waved him off as he rushed back to Lapis. Connie quickly followed, choosing to exchange her tickets for several bags of candy. 

"Lapis, look what I got!" He held it up to her face, the widest possible grin stretched across his face. 

It was a plush lion. Moderately sized with a fluffy cotton candy mane. It was pink, which Lapis thought was strange but decided not to question it, seeing as the kid was so happy. 

"What're ya gonna name it, Steven?" She asked, ruffling its soft mane before he pulled it back to his chest. 

"Lion" he answered proudly, hugging the stuffed animal. 

Lapis nodded, "cute" she mumbled before slipping her phone back into her bag and saying "look, I gotta go now. Its getting late and I still have to go get some more food. Do you want me to walk you home or are you okay?"

"I'm okay, thank you" Steven replied politely. 

The blue haired girl nodded and set off back to her apartment to grab some more money, change out of her sweaty clothes, drop off her bag and towel, and then finally exited the building to go buy some more supplies. As she passed down the empty street lined with houses (a shortcut), her gaze spotted an anomaly in the background. A head of blonde hair and the tip of a shoe could be seen as Lapis walked down the road, slowly becoming more and more visible as she drew closer. And then she stopped. Half of it was because she had just realized who it was, and moving any closer would surely get the others attention. She really didn't want to talk to her right now. The other half was because she noticed the glistening of tears on her freckled face. Even though the other was facing down toward the road, she would still see her wet cheeks, and the damp ends of her hoodie as she attempted to brush them away with the tough fabric. 

She did not have a lot of time before the local store closed, and this shortcut would definitely give her enough time to get the things she needed, pay and leave before it shut. But it also ran the risk of talking to Peridot who, even though she was clearly having an existential crisis and Lapis was lowkey concerned, she didn't want to have that discussion. At least, not today. And so, with her mind finally made up, she quietly made her way back down the road and around the pier to get to the store. The journey was longer and her legs ached when she finally arrived at the building. 

The first thing she realised was that it was shut. The door had been locked with a thick padlock and the windows covered by metal shutters. The large vibrant sign had been switched off and was now a dull, boring grey. 

"For fucks sake" Lapis hissed, throwing her hands angrily into the air. She kicked the door before turning to head back to her apartment, exhausted and angry. She wasn't sure if she had enough food left for dinner. 

• 

The slight movement in the corner of her eye made Peridot look up, frantically wiping at her eyes in case it was someone who had accidentally wandered down the wrong street. She didn't want to be comforted by a random stranger. She didn't want to be comforted. This wasn't her job, she wasn't allowed to sit around and cry. Wasn't allowed to ignore the mortal she was assigned to. Peridot wasn't even sure why she was crying, or why she had been attracted to this house in particular. Whenever she tried to think about her past, her head throbbed angrily, and tears fell down her face without permission. Something wasn't right. It never was. She was doing the one thing she wasn't allowed to do; show weakness. 

Standing up and stretching out her aching limbs, she decided to head back to the beach and wait for Lapis until the morning. By now the sky had grown an inky blue, which eventually faded into a deep navy. The sand looked almost grey in the light of the moon, and the sea, nothing but an inky expanse along the horizon. She sat on the soft sand, leaning against the cliff, running her hands along the rough stone as she slid down. 

Okay, she needed to actually think about the situation instead of just moping. First of all; Lapis hated her. It wasn't uncommon for an assigned mortal to hate their demon, in fact, it was pretty much expected. But Peridot knew that what she did wasn't clever. It didn't help her situation at all. She hadn't even shown herself yet, at least, not in her demon form. She was falling behind and she knew that if she didn't do anything, bad things would happen to her. Why bad things? Well, she wasn't that sure but it probably resulted in her demise. She had acted out and now this was her punishment. And if she didn't fix it, Yellow would certainly be after her. 

The first step to gaining Lapis' trust would be to apologize for her actions. Confront her in a public space, maybe that cafe she worked at, or on campus. Try to reason with her, ask to start again, gain her trust, show herself and eventually be the cause of her death. It shouldn't be that hard. Peridot had been doing this for years, each time another mortal died at her hands, the easier it got to let go of the guilt. But the thought of apologizing left a foul taste in her mouth. 

Her mind went back to the first time she'd been forced back to Earth to ruin someone's life enough for them to end it. When Peridot had first heard that that was what she had to do for what seemed like the rest of eternity, she had broken down. She had cried in front of Yellow Diamond, and she had just scowled and gestured for her assistant to usher her out of her office. Although the memory was fuzzy, Peridot vaguely remembered fighting back, decking the woman clutching her arms straight in the face and attempting to make a run for it. She had made to to the far door before several other demons jumped her, and had crashed clumsily into the floor, knocking her head on the hard stone.  She remembered screaming, crying, cursing. A large body rising from her much smaller one, a gigantic hand reaching down. That was how she'd met Jasper, who turned out to be a lifelong friend after many, many arguments. 

Nowadays, Peridot didn't really feel anything when she looked down on the living. Just emptiness. And so her mission was as easy as it always had been. Befriend Lapis. Kill her. Except for some reason, she felt as if I would be a lot harder than that. 

• 

Lapis settled onto the seat behind her desk and set her notebook and pens onto the chipped wood, arranging them into a neat line, then leaning back on her chair and watching as the other students filtered in. Eventually, a familiar face stepped into the whitewashed room. Ice blue eyes gazed around the room until they finally landed on Lapis. Pearls thin lips were drawn up into a smile as she trotted over, clutching her notebooks to her chest. She slid into the seat beside her, greeting her with a quick 'hello' before gathering up what she needed for the lesson. 

The room itself was big, holding all least ten rows of desks. At the front was a desk with a computer on it, and beside that, taking up most of the wall, a whiteboard. It was glowing white, the projector had been tuned on but nothing was showing. A man, the tired professor, sat at the front, frantically clicking the mouse and occasionally looking up to glance anxiously at the gathering crowd. 

"Hey, Lapis" Pearls voice drifted above the noise of the classroom and Lapis turned towards her with a slight questioning tilt of her head. She continued "You feeling better today? I know I haven't spoken to you since Friday but Steven says that you seemed to be getting better". 

The others knew. Or, somewhat knew, about Lapis' 'problems' and past experiences. Naturally, they'd tried to help, but there was only so much they could do before Lapis became to overwhelmed in all the sympathy and turned them away. The blue haired girl nodded before speaking quietly "mmhm. I think hanging out with Steven really cleared my head". Not the truth, but also not a lie. A half lie. 

Hanging out with Steven always made Lapis feel a little better about herself. The kid never constantly asked if she was okay and never talked about her state unless she was the one who started the conversation. He often let Lapis do what she wanted, whatever made her feel the most comfortable, and often opted to hang out at the beach or at his little beach house and play video games, avoiding large crowds of people as it made Lapis feel uncomfortable. 

The sound of a chairs scraping against the creaky wooden floor brought her attention back up to the front of the class. The professor had stood up, and was now situated at the front of the classroom, a whiteboard pen in one hand, the other deep in the pockets of his khaki shorts.  The lesson had started and the room eventually grew quiet. Lapis opened up her notebook and flipped to a bank page, pen in hand, ready to learn. 

• 

After school, Lapis walked over to Fusion Cuisine with Pearl, where she dropped her bag in a corner, donned an apron and set off to work. The after school shift was only moderately busy, mostly students coming in to grab a caffeinated drink and some sugary food for a study session, or just people hanging around their social groups. As always, Lapis was stuck behind the counter, tapping a finger along to the quiet music playing from the speakers in the back of the room. 

Her mind often drifted to the strange blonde she had encountered days before. Thinking about to their conversation back at her flat. 

"I think the question you should be asking is what am I"

Her words rung in her head. What did this mean? Was she not human? Did it have something to do with how defensive she got on the subject of her leg? Was it just something she had said to trick Lapis? But what would Peridot even gain from trying to trick her? Nothing. She was just a stranger to her, an unfamiliar face. 

"Um. Excuse me" a distant voice. It sounded familiar and yet, not quite recognizable. A pale hand waved across her face and her unfocused eyes blinked at the sudden movement in front of them.  Once her eyes finally began focusing, she realised she was face to face with someone she wasn't sure she wanted to see ever again. 

The blonde hair, short and fluffy, small stature, forest green eyes, the freckles on her face, dark and prominent. Lapis scowled and raised her eyebrows at the smaller, who looked guiltily back up at her. 

"What" Lapis hissed quietly, leaning forward on the counter to glare daggers at the blonde, who backed away a couple steps afterwards. 

Peridot seemed to be panicking now. Her hands clasped tightly together, her feet shuffling on the carpeted floor. She opened her mouth to say something but immediately closed it, her cheeks growing darker. 

"Hurry up, I don't have all day" Lapis spat, making the smaller jump a little. It was kind of funny seeing her so nervous when only a couple of day ago he was confident in the way she spoke to the blue haired woman. 

"I just came to apologize" she started off with a wavering voice "for what I said. It was rude and insensitive and I'm sorry". Peridot wouldn't make eye contact with her. She was sweating. 

With a sigh, Lapis replied with a small "its okay,  just don't try that shit again" and handed her a drink. 

Peridot looked up, eyebrow raised as her eyes flicked down to the drink and then back up to the grimacing barista. 

"Don't worry, it's on me". She still sounded pissed.

With a tiny nod, the blonde accepted the coffee, wrapping her tiny hands around he cup, taking a small sip then moving to a booth in the corner closest to the counter. 

Lapis wasn't too sure why she had done that. He initial thoughts were to just ignore the blonde, possibly ban her from the cafe somehow, make sure she never saw her face again. But her body had stopped listening to her brain at that moment, Peridot looked honestly sorry, and so she gave her another chance. Lapis had always had trouble getting close to people, Steven being the only exception. Hell, she even kind of got along with Garnet, Amethyst and Pearl, so that was at least five, including Sadie. 

But they didn't know fully. Didn't understand her struggles, the thoughts that plagued her mind at night. The flashbacks, the memories, she couldn't tell them. She had trouble  talking about her problems, that was probably why she had lashed out at Peridot in the first place. Other than the fact that she was still a complete stranger. Maybe she was just trying to help? Maybe she was going through the same stuff as her? Her gaze eventually flowed back onto the other woman. She had taken out a phone, her thin digits flying across the screen as she texted. A tiny green bubble popped up on her screen and she grinned. Lapis wasn't sure why but she was smiling too. Maybe it was contagious. Maybe it was the aura Peridot was now giving off. She looked like an excitable child, bouncing on her seat with that dorky grin, coffee still on the table, half full. A contrast to the Peridot she had seen yesterday. 

And lapis knew that whatever Peridot had to offer, she was ready. 

But if she'd know what the blonde was capable of, she wouldn't have said that. 

•

Peridot wasn't sure why she had stumbled when speaking to Lapis. Her task was easy, apologize, gain her trust. But that was in the past now. She had surprisingly succeeded and was now sitting on the soft plush seats of the booth. She was smiling, something she didn't often do, and it felt weird. 

During her last mission she and Jasper had bought phones, exchanged numbers (that they'd gotten from Yellow so that they could communicate) and had often texted, since they rarely got any time to catch up. Apparently Jasper as still waiting for her next mission, aimlessly wandering around Hell until she was called upon by Yellow. Peridot tried to suppress a grin as she typed a reply. 

"Um. Hey" another person slid into the booth, she had another drink in her hand and passed it over to Peridot to replace her other one. 

Peridot looked up, sliding the phone into her pocket to take the drink. She wrapped her tiny hands around it, feeling the warmth seep into her skin. Lapis waited patiently for the other to reply, fidgeting in her seat, occasionally glancing back towards the counter, where a bored Amethyst was standing, picking her nose. 

"Thanks" came her mumbled reply. "I should really pay you this time, though.."

"Nah it's fine. Just don't tell Pearl or she'll gut me" Lapis winked and Peridot smirked behind the cup as she took another sip. 

"Okay then. I just hope you don't do this will all the strangers you meet" she joked. 

"Only the cute ones" she replied with a wink.

Peridot gasped into her drink and started to cough violently. Her cheeks growing a deep red as she tried to compose herself. 

Lapis chuckled, leaning back against the plush with a calm smile "I guess you're not as bad as I thought". 

"Yeah I was kinda a bitch when I came into your house and said those things. I'm still sorry about that" she cleared her throat awkwardly. 

"Why did you do that?"

Peridot's eyes immedietly dropped onto her drink. She ran a finger along to top of the cup. "Well I.." She trailed off, grimacing at the end of the sentence before shaking her head "never mind that, can we start fresh?". 

Lapis hesitated before nodding, trying to ignore the way her gut twisted uncomfortably. This was a little strange. 

"Okay cool. Uh. I'm Peridot, I'm new to Beach City. I like building robots and watching Camp Pining Hearts" she held out a pale hand to shake, a dorky grin on her face, although it didn't reach her eyes. 

With a snort, Lapis accepted the handshake before replying "I'm Lapis, I've lived here all my life. I'm majoring in marine biology at the university. But I guess you already knew that". 

Peridot shrugged guilty and Lapis took one final glance at the back of the room before standing, grabbing a napkin and a pen from the pocket of her apron, scribbling something down, handing it to Peridot who shook her head and tore it in half to write her own digits onto it, winking again and then going back to mann the counter. 

"Finished hanging out with your girlfriend?" Amethyst asked as she wiggled her eyebrows at the blue haired woman. 

Lapis elbowed her as she walked past "fuck off I just met her". 

Amethyst snorted rudely, tapping the hand that was still clutching the other half of the napkin. Lapis' face blanched. She pushed her way back to the counter, stuffing the napkin into her pocket and glaring at the lavender haired girl through narrowed eyes. 

Peridot eventually left, the sound of the bell on the door was the only thing that indicated that she had been in the cafe. She watched as she disappeared into the night without a noise. Where she was going, Lapis had no clue, but the promise of seeing the blonde again in the morning made her lips turn up into a genuine smile. 

Making sure no one was nearby, and that no customers were waiting to be served, she took the napkin out of her pocket and traced the numbers written in old biro pen. Peridot's handwriting was spindly and cursive. 

With great care, she transferred the digits into her phone and sent out a single text before stuffing both items back into her pocket and leaning her arms against the counter. She didn't know what she was doing. Trusting a girl she'd just met. Texting her. This wasn't Lapis. But she felt as if this could be good for her. She'd been living in darkness for so long, maybe it was time she moved back into the light. And maybe Peridot was her light. 

• 

Peridot's phone buzzed and she stopped walking to check who was texting her. It was an unknown number. She hesitantly tapped on the message: 

Hey, its Lapis :) 

Her lips twisted into a tiny smile as she added the number onto her contact list and sent back a quick message before continuing to stride down the road with a newfound confidence in her step.


	3. Hothouse

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song is Hothouse by 78Violet

_A loud crash followed by an angry yell echoes through the house. Heavy footsteps, the sounds of even more yelling, angry curse words Lapis had never heard. The slam of a door, she could feel it shake on its hinges through the impact. A shiver ran down her spine as she cowered underneath her desk, hands clasped over her ears, eyes squeezed shut. Any slight noise coming from outside her room made her jump, her heart thudding painfully against her tiny ribcage. So small. So fragile. Curses falling on innocent ears._

_More footsteps. They were loud. Loud against the ratty wooden floors. Each footfall echoed like thunder in her ears and she curled up on herself, trying to make herself smaller. Nonexistent. The sound of her door opening, a slight creaking sound as weight was put on the loose floorboards of her room. A tiny inaudible gasp escaped her lips and she smacked a hand over her mouth and began to tremble._

_She could see boots, big and clunky and caked thickly in mud. They stumbled a bit before managing to gain balance. Then paused. A sound. Lapis wasn't sure what the sound was but she didn't like it. The slight tap of fingers clenching wood. A sharp tug and her desk was flung to the other side of the room. Dark hands getting closer, palms spread out, old and calloused. Chipped fingernails with dirt under them, a scar on one finger, pale in contrast to the skin. Lapis screamed._

And then she woke up. Her body flung itself forward and she began to cough violently. She could feel the bile rising in her throat but she stayed put, her body frozen in time. Her limbs were like stone, stiff and unmoving. She blinked slowly and she felt like she was drowning, all air being forced out of her lungs in one final breath. Water was filling up her lungs as she struggled to catch her breath. The bile was rising, her mind was a vast emptiness. Every time she blinked she saw his hands. Felt hot skin against her own. She tried to cry out but she knew no one would be listening so she closed her mouth tightly.

With shaky hands, she checked the time on her phone. It had just turned 4 am. Well, there's was no use sleeping anymore, she figured, and rose from the soft embrace of her bed, letting the covers fall to her feet. She changed into something a little warmer for the colder months, a large hoodie and a pair of old jeans, and exited the building with clouded eyes. Lapis closed her tired eyes, letting the cold wind bite at her exposed face. It felt real. It made her feel real. Her head started to clear but her breathing was still ragged and sharp. She decided to take a walk.

The cold concrete was a welcomed feeling under her bare feet. The sharp sting of loose parts digging into her skin was not as welcome but still appreciated. The fog in her head was beginning to clear out, swirling around in her brain and evaporating into thin air, along with the lingering fear it brought her. She kept walking. The bottom of her jeans occasionally slid down over her feet as she walked, her hands were pressed tight against her body, hidden deep in her hoodie pocket. It was cold. She shivered against the wind, gritting her teeth and squinting her eyes and pressing on because the thought of going back to her dreams was enough for her to move.

And then she heard it. It was quiet at first, just a gentle whisper that one could've mistake as wind. But as she grew closer, it turned into a soft hum. It was slightly off key but Lapis couldn't help but continue walking towards it. The faint ache in her feet had long since gone, her skin had grown used to walking on the sharp pavement after years of doing so. She turned the corner.

•

Peridot sat on her little curb and hummed a tune in an attempt to kill time. Waiting was long and tedious, but she knew humans needed their sleep, especially Lapis. She wasn't really sure what she was doing, normally she'd pick out an abandoned building or apartment to live it, fix it up so that she could shower and eat. But those times, were different. She wondered if she could open the door to the old rundown house adjacent to her. It was a start, her hair was growing more and more greasy as the days went by and there was only so much she could bare. So she hummed in thought as she stared at the house, wondering if the door was locked or if she'd have to try one of the windows.

A footstep behind her. Her sensitive ears barely picked it up but it was there. She spun around, jumping up to her feet and turning, ready to run. A head of blue hair emerged from the shadows and she immediately relaxed. Then she realised what time it was and her eyebrows shot up.

"The fuck are you doing, its like, 4am, Lapis. Don't you have class tomorrow?" Peridot asked, raising her voice above the growing wind. 

Lapis jumped, looking alarmed as she heard her name being called. She made eye contact with Peridot and a ghost of a smile painted her features.

"Couldn't sleep. You to?"

"Uh..." no, it wasn't "yeah" Peridot slowly lowered herself back onto the pavement and felt Lapis do the same with a long sigh.

The two sat together, just listening the the wind howling in their ears until Lapis couldn't stand it and opened her mouth to speak.

"So, Peridot" she said after a couple of beats of uncomfortable silence "where are you from?"

Shit. Okay, Peridot didn't know where she was from. Or, she couldn't remember. Of course, she had a special connection to the house adjacent to her, but she felt like it was some sort of secondary home. Like, she had another one somewhere else but she wasn't sure where and if she'd ever find it. So she tried to tell the half truth.

"I used to live here when I was a kid" she spoke, trying not to let her voice shake "then I moved away, somewhere far, far away" she trailed off and hoped Lapis wouldn't ask any followup questions.

But the girl seemed too out of it to even process what she had just said. Lapis hummed "and now you're back here!" She finally concluded.

"Yeah, I guess I am".

Lapis smiled. I was a tired, lazy smile, it was a lot different from her trademark scowl. Her blue eyes locked onto the smaller woman's green ones. They sat in silence, just staring at each other. And then Lapis snapped back, blinking rapidly.

"Woah. Um. Sorry" her face blanched "I'm a little out of it. Haven't slept that well in a while" she chuckled nervously.

"S'fine" Peridot mumbled, averting her face away from the woman and down the street.

"Yeah" Lapis said absently "so, why are you here? I uh, think I saw you down this street a couple days ago. Do you live here?"

"I guess you could say that" the blonde replied with a shrug.

"Where do you live, then?" Lapis shot back with a raised eyebrow.

"Around"

"That doesn't help at all"

"Mmhm" Peridot hoped Lapis would leave it at that. She'd only met her a couple days ago, an hadn't been on good terms until yesterday. Telling her that she was practically homeless might not be the best idea. Unless the stubborn uni student was willing to give up her spare room.

Lapis seemed to frown into the darkness as she followed Peridot's gaze back to the house. The spooky abandoned house that hadn't been touched in years, and held many, many rumors and tales about many different occurrences. No one in town had dared to enter it, and no tourist or visitors would go near it.

"Do you live in there?" Lapis finally asked, jabbing her thumb towards the house. "Haven't your heard the stories?"

Peridot seemed to snap out of whatever daze she was in. She blinked at the house the turned to Lapis. Her eyes seemed to have a slight glint in the dark, much like a cats when you shine a torch at it in the dark. They were wide, pupils thin inhuman slits, Lapis was sure she could see tiny fangs from behind her lips. Peridot stumbled forward, standing up, doubled over looking as if she as about to throw up. Lapis quickly followed, hands raised, ready to help her new friend. Peridot's back was to hers now, fists in her hair, pulling. She was shaking. She wasn't sure why.

She suddenly turned towards Lapis, her inhuman features morphing back. Her eyes glinted with a fresh layer of tears. She took in a shaky breath and tried to compose herself. Tried to stop her mind from wandering. Memories of her past, her mortal existence, pushing against the barrier. Lapis. Lapis was her key.

"Do-" she swallowed the lump in her throat "do you know what happened here?"

Lapis nodded, her expression one of great concern. "Yeah. Are you okay? You seem a bit pale" she stepped closer, hand hovering close to Peridot's face. She could feel her body heat from where she stood, quivering. It was warm. Welcoming.

"Uh. Yeah" she forced her face into a wide smile, stepping back up onto the pathway "just....bad memories Y'know?"

A nod from the blue haired woman. A look of understanding. Sympathetic. "You never answered my first question" she said quietly.

"Oh" Peridot replied dumbly "I don't really live anywhere at the moment" she finally confessed with a guilty grin.

Lapis' eyes grew as wide as saucepans. "You've been here for what? Almost a week and now you tell me you've been living on the streets!?"

Peridot shrugged.

With an annoyed sigh, Lapis grabbed Peridot's arm "follow me".

"Okay?"

They began walking. Walking back to Lapis' apartment. It was small but so was Peridot, and she didn't seem to have any belongings with her except for her phone and some clothing. But she hadn't noticed Peridot's withering appearance until now. Her greasy hair that seemed to stick to her cheeks. Dirt underneath her fingernails, mostly bitten off. Filthy shoes, probably her only pair. Green converse. Ratty. Worn.

"Jesus" Lapis muttered.

They ascended the stairs more slowly, because Lapis remembered Peridot had shitty legs or something along those lines. And then, after forcing the door open, invited the smaller in. As soon as the blonde stepped foot on the ragged floor, Lapis immediately sent her towards the bathroom, instructing her to take a shower and then they'd talk.

Peridot opened her mouth in an attempt to say something, but with one final push, she stumbled clumsily into the bathroom where the door was shut rudely in her face.

"Turn it right for hot water" came Lapis' muffled voice from the other side of the door.

With a sigh, the demon began to slip off her clothes.

•

The couch sagged under her weight as she sat. Feet - grubby from walking down the street without shoes on - propped on the coffee table, leaving tiny clumps of dirt that stuck to the wood. What was she doing? Firstly, letting a complete stranger into her life and exchanging phone numbers was miles out of her comfort zone. And now letting said (homeless?) Stranger into her home as if the first time the blonde had entered had never happened. And yet, Lapis didn't feel the last bit worried. Sure, negative thoughts popped into her at the thought of having a roommate- would she pay half the rent? Does she even have a job? What if she's actually a murderer? But those thoughts were weighed down at the concept of having another body so close by. Someone to rant to. A shoulder to cry on when things became too overbearing. She was sure Peridot could understand. Could sympathize.

She could hear the tinny sound of water hitting the bathtub, and the less familiar sound sound of annoyed grumbling and tiny thumps as Peridot tried to arrange herself so that she perched on the side of the tub. The thud on a shampoo bottle hitting the tiled floor. The loud 'fuck' that came after it. Lapis' lips twitched.

Peridot had been in the shower for along time. At least an hour tops. Surely it didn't take that long to scrub the dirt from her skin and wash her greasy hair. Lapis knocked on the door minutes later. Shuffling was heard from the other side, the click of the door being unlocked, and finally Peridot's head poking out from the crack.

"You okay in there, its been like, an hour" Lapis said, trying not to let her eyes wander curiously to the towel wrapped around the blondes body.

"I don't" she swallowed, almost nervously "have any clothes. To change into. My old ones are pretty gross" she continued hesitantly.

"Oh"

Stupid. She spun around and grabbed some spare clothes from her room that she knew would be way too big for the smaller woman, but the nights were getting colder. She passed them over to Peridot's outstretched hand, and she quickly shut the door and locked it behind her.

And Lapis waited. Waited until she saw the clock in her kitchens hands move downwards, and the door creak open. The small figure of Peridot stepped out, cheeks red in what looked like embarrassment but could've been something else. She was wearing a long plain blue shirt that almost went down to her knees and long pyjama bottoms, which slid across the floor as she walked. And as disgusting as it was, Peridot had tugged on her old socks. They were green with little yellow tips, a little dirty but probably the most wearable item of clothing the blonde had at the moment. One foot clunked unnaturally against the floor. Lapis paid no mind, busying herself in her tiny kitchen.

"You hungry?" She asked, throwing a look begin her shoulder before bending down to grab some plates.

"Sure" came her reply.

That wasn't really an answer to her question, but Lapis brushed it of and began preparing stir fry. It was a simple dish, made from ingredients she had pick up this morning before classes. She wasn't sure if Peridot had even eaten since she'd arrived at beach city, but refrained from asking any more personal questions, instead opting to give her the larger portion of the dish.

Meanwhile, Peridot sat slumped against the sofa, trying not to let the unfamiliar smell of Lapis' clothes distract her from her texting. She was speaking to Jasper, who was still hanging around with nothing to do, awaiting the call of Yellow Diamond with anticipation. And here Peridot was, finally getting on with her mission after befriending Lapis. And somehow letting her take up her spare room without much persuading. Maybe she would use the homeless act on future missions. For some reason the prospect of future mission made Peridot's chest ache.

The blonde groaned and shifted her position, guessing that the sudden ache was just because she was sitting funny, or indigestion or something. But then again, demons didn't need to eat, or, they had to but in small amounts and not as much as regular humans did. That didn't stop Peridot's mouth from watering when the smell of noodles wafted over from the kitchen.

"So" Lapis broke the silence that had been clouding the room, raising her voice above the bubbling pots on the stove. "Who are you talking to?"

Peridot glanced down at the phone in her hands. And then back up to Lapis, who had turned around from her cooking to look expectantly at the blonde.

"Just a friend" she shrugged.

Lapis raised a skeptical eyebrow. "Do they live here?"

"No. She doesn't live anywhere near here. She's far away".

"Oh man, that sucks" Lapis said with a light sigh "I know how that feels. Having someone you care about be so far away".

Peridot nodded along. And then-

"OH, SHIT!" Lapis hissed, reeling back from the boiling water bubbling over the pot. It pooled around the top of the stove as Lapis frantically started twisting the dials in an attempt to reduce the heat. 

"STOP LAUGHING" Lapis yelled, glaring at the snickering blonde, although her lips had turned up at the corners, indicating that she wasn't mad.

"Sorry, I just thought you'd be smarter than to turn around and get distracted in a conversation" Peridot replied through her laughter.

Lapis rolled her eyes but by now she was grinning back at her new friend. She spun back around and finished preparing the meal in a comfortable, friendly silence. The only sound was the tiny clicking as Lapis set things down, and the taps of Peridot's fingernails hitting the screen as she typed to her mysterious friend.

Fifteen minutes later, Lapis stopped in front of Peridot brandishing two plates full to the brim with noodles and vegetables alike. Peridot smiled and tucked in straight away.

"Compliments to the chef" she said as she shoveled forkfuls of noodles into her mouth.

Lapis laughed and began eating.

•

It was strange having someone else living in your apartment. Especially when you could hear them shuffling about in the room next to yours, and muttering something you couldn't quite hear. Lapis wasn't sure what time it was, only that she had been awoken to a crash, yelling, and now shuffling footsteps. It seemed as if Peridot was pacing, although every now and then she would hiss something that sounded extremely vulgar, and then continue on.  Lapis wasn't sure what she was doing. There was also the continual thud of something artificial hitting the old wooden floor after every soft step Peridot took. Now that, Lapis thought, was strange. From what she knew, Peridot had no other belongings apart from her phone and clothes. And Lapis also knew that there was nothing in the spare room that could make that type of noise.

And so, he was left to wonder. Laying on her side in her king sized bed, face pressed firmly against the soft pillows, too lazy to move, too awake to go back to sleep. She was stuck. And yet, the only thing preventing her from getting a somewhat good nights sleep was the person pacing around the room next to hers.

"Peridot" she yelled, hoping that she would hear through the thin walls if she spoke loud enough.

The pacing stopped. "Oh. Sorry. Did I wake you up?"

"Yeah. Its-" Lapis shuffled over to her phone and quickly checked the time. She sighed "its 6 in the morning. I have to get up in like, an hour" the last part was mostly said to herself. She was exhausted. Her body was exhausted, both mentally and physically after the eventful night, and then only getting about a half hour of sleep. 

She heard a muffled hum and then another quiet "sorry". The sounds of footsteps walking in the other direction. The creak of weigh being put on the old bed. The frame was old, worn. But Peridot was tiny. It wouldn't break.

"Its fine" Lapis heard herself say through her thoughts. She stood up, stretching "may as well get up now. It'll give me time to eat something for a change".

Nothing from the other side of the wall.

With a shrug, she exited the room, took a quick shower, changed, and then started making herself a mountain of pancakes. Lapis had picked up the ingredients a couple of days ago, in the hopes of treating herself. But after everything that had happened over the past few days, she'd completely forgotten about them. And now, the sweet vanilla smell of batter was wafting through the apartment.

The bang of a door shutting made Lapis turn around. Peridot was standing tiredly behind the couch, rubbing her eyes, her clouded gaze never leaving her feet as she walked over to the kitchen to sit down. Her hair, Lapis noticed, was a mess, sticking up even worse than it was normally. And that was saying something.

"God, how long has it been since you've gotten a good nights sleep? You look like shit".

"Thanks, I know".

Another wave of silence. And when the sweet treats were stacked high enough to topple over, Lapis began transferring them onto two separate plates.

"Syrup?" She asked, sliding the bottle over to Peridot, who nodded absently, and started drowning her pancakes in it.

•

Peridot wasn't sure what she was going to do whilst Lapis was gone. She herself didn't have school, or a job. Or anything. And it seemed as if Lapis didn't quite trust her in the apartment alone. The blue haired woman glared at her as she began to get ready, grabbing her bag, slipping on her shoes. Peridot returned the gaze evenly, no emotion on her face.

"Peridot" she finally said as she stop by the door, one hand already placed on top of the handle, keys clutched in the other. "Are you coming?"

Peridot blinked. "I guess so".

The two made their way carefully down the stairs. Lapis had stopped to talk to her 'neighbor', a short, stocky woman with blonde hair and a warm smile halfway down. Peridot had decided not to make contact, instead opting to awkwardly shuffle her feet and stare at the stairwell until Lapis had finished. She felt like a child waiting for her Parent to stop talking to an old friend she had seen on the street. But she wouldn't stop, no matter how much you whined or pulled.

"Lapis, you're going to be late" she muttered angrily, and took joy in watching the blue haired woman's eyes grow wide in realization.

She took the sleeve of Peridot's shirt and ran out of the building. Peridot tried not to trip over her own feet as they sped towards campus. Lapis didn't stop running until she arrived at the main building, letting go of Peridot's hands and waving at her from behind her shoulder and slipping through the double doors.

Peridot stood at the top of the steps, staring at the door absently. Ok then, what was she meant to do now? Lapis had just abandoned her. She couldn't go back to the apartment because she didn't have a key, and walking up three flights of stairs didn't really sound ideal right about now. So, with nothing else to do, she spun around and headed off towards the beach, which, other than the old house, seemed to be her default destination to go to when there was nothing else to do.

She stepped off the pier and into the soft sand. The fresh converse she had been given by Lapis immediately sank into the sand and she could feel it seep into her shoes as she trudged to her usual spot. She sat down roughly and grumbled as she slowly took off the shoes, deciding it wasn't worth walking around with mountains of sand in them if she was going to stay here for a while. The cold air bit at her socked feet as she wriggled her toes and buried them into the sand with an angry sigh. The rock of the cliff behind her dug into the thin fabric of her hoodie, another borrowed item of Lapis'. It was sharp and the pain was beginning to spread along her back but she didn't move, or even adjust her position.

Peridot knew she deserved all the pain in the world. Especially since she had been the cause of so much suffering in the past, and god knows how much more in the future. Lapis was but another tally to add to her already miles long list of victims. But that didn't stop her mind from wandering to the last time she'd seen her at the beach. In her bikini. Swimming.

Frantically shaking the thoughts out of her head before they developed, Peridot didn't notice a small figure approaching her until it was too late. She had blinked rapidly until her mind had become clearer and the dirty thoughts had vanished and then she had noticed the shadow looming over her. She froze, tensing up, ready to leap up and attack the stranger if things got too intense. But then she noticed that the shadow was a lot smaller than an average human adults. It was a kid. No, it was the boy she'd seen with Lapis the other day.

"Uh. Hey?" It wasn't a greeting. It was a question. _What_ _do_ _you_ _want_ _?_ _Did_ _you_ _see_ _me_ _staring_ _at_ _you_ _last_ _time_ _I_ _was_ _here_ _?_ _Who are_ _you_ _?_ It did little to ease the tension in her shoulders.

The boy seemed to look straight through Peridot's obvious discomfort, and instead greeted her with a kind, timid smile "Hello! I'm Steven Universe, I live in the house up there" he pointed over to the wooden house situated on the side of the cliff. He turned back towards her, dark eyes glowing in the sun "I've seen you sit up here quite often this past week. I was just wondering if you're okay, and if there's anything I can do to help".

He seemed genuinely concerned, even thought Peridot was a stranger who had just randomly appeared on the beach one day. And the fact that he'd been sort of watching her made everything seem a little strange, but with him held an air of comfort and she almost relaxed as she finally spoke.

"Oh. Um, yeah I'm fine just...thinking. About stuff. Life, Y'know?" Her response was awkward. She'd never liked mingling with other mortals when on duty and tended to stay away whenever her victim had friends or family over. Socializing had never been her strong point and that wasn't going to change because of some friendly kid.

"Yeah, I get that" he said, his voice held a tone of sympathy. He moved to sit down beside Peridot, grunting as he lowered himself clumsily onto the soft sand. "I like to sit here and read with my friend Connie" at this Peridot's mind immediately thought of the girl he was with when he met up with Lapis on the beach and she nodded.

"Got any recommendations?" She asked absently, gazing out across the ocean.

Steven seemed to light up at her question and he struggled to stand up with all his newfound excitement. "Wait here!" He called back as he scrambled up the wooden steps of his little house and sprinted inside.

Peridot wondered what would happen if she just got up and left before he came back. The obvious answer would be not having to sit through hours of Steven talking about the books he was reading with his friend, what his favourite scenes were, how pretty the covers looked, his favourite characters etc. But another part of her was begging her to stay. Because it was still pretty early in the day despite Peridot trying to sleep in the bed Lapis had given her, but still waking up at ungodly hours because her mind had wandered too far and she could barely concentrate on sleeping and had started pacing for what felt like hours until Lapis had woken up. She was tired, that was obvious. But sleeping wasn't really an option now. And neither was moving. The part of her mind that was making her stay was almost excited at the prospect of talking about books. In her mortal life she had always enjoyed buying new books, cracking open the covers and reading the words on crisp pages.

It reminded her of when she actually had a life, and wasn't a slave to her diamond. When she could freely walk around the city and enjoy the views instead of following some depressed mortal, calculating when the right moment to strike was. And so, when Steven came running back to their spot books stacked high in his arms, she felt herself smile and he smiled back. Something in her chest panged. It was painful but also a welcome feeling. For the first time in what felt like centuries, she felt at peace.

•

Lapis groaned as she slipped into a booth, hands wrapped around a steaming mug of black coffee. She leant against the soft cushions, savoring the warmth that spread across her back and the way they cushioned her neck so that it wouldn't click painfully if she moved. Amethyst sat on the other side, leaning forward, phone in one hand rapidly texting and a half eaten sandwich in the other. Lapis wasn't sure what was in the sandwich and frankly, she wasn't sure she wanted to find out.

"How was class?" The shorter woman asked through another mouthful of bread. Her dark eyes snapped up from her phone to look at her friend but immediately went back down when the device buzzed in her hand.

Her question prompted another groan from the blue haired woman, who leant back impossibly further in her seat.

"It was shit" she finally said and took a long sip of her coffee. It was just as bitter as her attitude.

"Yeah, but it was your decision to go to uni. Not sure what you expected, dude" Amethyst shrugged.

"Technically its the Uni's fault for accepting me onto the course" Lapis mumbled.

"Once again, your fault for applying".

Lapis sighed "when I get home I'm gonna take the longest bath ever and its gonna be fucking amazing".

Amethyst chuckled "yeah I bet it will".

Another buzz came from her phone and she tapped around until she found what she was looking for. She mumbled something under her breath, rolling her eyes as she turned it off.

"Who was it?"

"Pearl"

"Ugh"

Their conversation seemed to die down after that. Amethyst had finished off her sandwich and was now working on the accompanying muffin she had bought with her meal and Lapis was absently running her fingers along the rim of her coffee mug.

"Hey. What happened to that girl? The one you were talking to the other day. Short, blonde, honestly kinda cute. What's up with that?" The silence was broken and a weight settled in Lapis' chest as the questions sunk in.

"Her name's Peridot and I let her room with me for a bit after I found her sitting on the streets last night" Lapis answered, ignoring the smug look Amethyst was now giving her "I don't think she has a house, which is a little strange for someone claiming to have just moved here".

"Maybe she ran away" Amethyst mused.

"Hmm. She has a phone, you saw it. And money, so I guess that's a possibility".

"Unless she stole it!" Her short friend said, stuffing the remains on the muffin in her mouth and wiping the crumbs off the table.

"No, I don't think so".

Amethyst ran a hand through her thick hair, shrugging her shoulders. "Still not sure why you let a homeless stranger into your house. What time did you meet her? Like, 4am? What were you even doing out there?"

"I had a bad dream so I decided to get some fresh air. And she was just sitting there. We talked, I invited her back, made her some food. I don't know why I did it-"

"I do" Amethyst added in, throwing Lapis a cheeky wink.

"Fuck off. I think I did it because for some reason I trust her. Its just... She feels so familiar to me yet I don't know why, or who she really is. I feel like she might help me, in a way..."

"Do you really think you can trust her?"

Lapis nodded "yeah, I think so". 

**Author's Note:**

> If any of you have any songs that you think fit into this au, please feel free to comment them!!


End file.
